As most of you know, I have been planning for a very long time to go to China with YWAM; over a year and a half to be exact. It was the place I first felt a pull to go and that pull was the main reason I chose to come to YWAM Maui specifically [its one of their main focus areas] but I said all the while that if God lead me to another country I would gladly go. Little did I know how I was about to be tested.
When I arrived I still had every intention of continuing with that plan. I talked about my desire to go to China with many other students and some of the staff and during the days leading up to and following the outreach locations being revieled my mind remained unchanged... almost. On the day they finally told us what our options would be we had to play a game of hang-man to guess the names of each country's capital city and then from that the name of the country. They came out to be Indonesia, China and Nepal. The moment Nepal was written on the white board something in my spirit stirred; a soft, nearly inaudible whisper, saying that I was supposed to go there instead. Immediately I resisted, shoving that thought to the very back of my mind and saying that it was an invention of my own head and not the Lord speaking to me.
Over the next two days I continued talking with the staff about my plans to go to China, and each time I would hear that voice telling me that if those plans remained unchanged I would be making the wrong decision. I would even say I was at peace with my decision to try and convince myself that I was and each time that voice would whisper "no, you're not". I continued to resist. I avoided talk of Nepal [when it was the subject of dicussion that whisper became much louder] and tried to stop thinking about it all together, I did not want to surrender my plans. I did not want to have to try and explain to people both at YWAM and back home that after a year and half of planning to go to China, in one afternoon my mind was changed and I was going to a country I knew nothing about. I couldn't comprehend it, that just wasn't going to happen.
Then a speaker named Marie came to lecture. She spoke on having greater faith and that greater faith requires greater testing. She also said that when you tell God you will do something He will take you at your word and test you in that as well. I continued to think of Nepal and the fact that I'd said I would go wherever God lead me. He was leading me there. I was immediately convicted. I would either choose to surrender and lay down my own plans and follow God's or choose to be a hypocrite. A suddenly felt a fire begin to burn in my chest I wanted to surrneder. She then gave a call to stand up if we wanted greater faith... I knew that it was going to take greater faith to follow God to Nepal [a country I knew nothing about] than China a country I'd studied and gotten to know over the past year or more. With tears pouring down my face I stood; then and there I gave my plans up to God and asked Him to confirm that going to Nepal was truely His will.
I felt suddenly light, but I still wanted God's confirmation. I called home and talked to my mum, asking her if she'd heard anything from God since I'd first told her the outreach locations. She orginally said she'd been thinking of China because it had been where I wanted to go for so long, but she was actually feeling more of a pull from Nepal. I couldn't believe it! Confirmation. I went a step more and asked her to [without saying anything about our conversation] ask my dad the same question. He said the exact same thing she had said! Confirmation twice! Then my mum told me that she had also talked to our pastor who had immediately said "He'd have a hard time knowing that it wasn't himself but God calling him to Nepal." He'd said it jokingly but that just happened to be the EXACT place I was now. Three times!
That night I wrote Outreach Location Choice #1: Nepal on my paper and I felt a peace I had not been able to find when my mind was still set on China.
And so, just to let everyone know, I am going to Nepal and I couldn't be happier! Himalayas here I come! Lord lead and guide me into intimacy and greater faith in You through this experience.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
We're Back...
Okay, so I know I said that I would fill everyone in on what happened during Exodus, but I've had a change of heart. I will say it was amazing, enlightening, challenging, hilarious, adventurous, and WAY outside my comfort zone, but thats all I'm going to give.
Why? Because I know a lot of YWAMers look up the blogs of people who've already gone to see what the experience is going to be like and I don't want to give anything away. It is an experience that needs to be had without prior knowledge... it simply makes it that much better.
If you want to know more I can send you a private message with more detail but I'm not going to right about it in my blog to make sure it stays a surprise for future DTS's.
It was an experience I will never forget. It opened my eyes and changed me forever. Exodus is AMAZING! the end for now.
Tomorrow starts our first actual lecture and I am so excited to see what we will be studying. I've been told that no matter how many times a person sits through the lecture phase they will always be challenged and impacted, so I'm sure it's going to be incredible as its my first time! Can't wait to update on all God is doing and how I am changing!
Goodnight and God Bless!
Why? Because I know a lot of YWAMers look up the blogs of people who've already gone to see what the experience is going to be like and I don't want to give anything away. It is an experience that needs to be had without prior knowledge... it simply makes it that much better.
If you want to know more I can send you a private message with more detail but I'm not going to right about it in my blog to make sure it stays a surprise for future DTS's.
It was an experience I will never forget. It opened my eyes and changed me forever. Exodus is AMAZING! the end for now.
Tomorrow starts our first actual lecture and I am so excited to see what we will be studying. I've been told that no matter how many times a person sits through the lecture phase they will always be challenged and impacted, so I'm sure it's going to be incredible as its my first time! Can't wait to update on all God is doing and how I am changing!
Goodnight and God Bless!
Sunday, September 13, 2009
EXODUS!
Day two of my YWAM experience began so amazingly. With the time change and all I ended up waking up at 5:13 this morning, laying in bed, unable to fall back to sleep. Okay, so that doesn't sound amazing at all but the amazing part came after. While I wondered what I was going to do at that hour I suddenly felt the urge to read Ephesians 5:13. I don't know exactly why, but I felt like the Spirit was leading me to do so. I fumbled around in the darkness as quietly as I could and found my bible and notebook, deciding to read that verse and start the day with a quiet time with the Lord.
I opened up my bible and began to read from verse 13 to the end of the chapter and I couldn't believe how perfectly it fit the starting of a DTS. It says the following
Ephesians 5:13-21
But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is the light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said, "Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." Be very careful, then, how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every oppertunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
I feel like the Lord really wants me to understand, that to truely walk in the Light of Christ and therefore to shine for Him, I have to wake up out of any spiritual ruts I've let myself fall into. He wants me to consider all my words and actions and make the most of every oppertunity to share the gospel with others, He wants me to seek His will in all things, He wants me to pursue Him that I might be filled with His holy presence. He wants me to use my gift of music, and to do it always for His honor and glory, and He wants me to submit myself to the service of others, becuase that is what Christ himself did.
I finished reading and just sat for a while taking it all in. I know God is going to do some amazing things and He's going to test me and stretch me in ways that will sometimes be painful and difficult, but they will bring me closer to being the person He wants me to be. A person more like Christ. That is the prayer of my heart and I can't wait to see Him move.
And so, that journey begins at 6 am tomorrow morning...
Tonight was the opening ceremony for the Fall 09 DTS. Everyone dressed up nice and was brought to a church in Paia. We walked in the doors and were waiting outside of a second set of doors that led to a fellowship area. Suddenly those doors were opened and all of the students were welcomed in by cheers and applause from all of the YWAM maui staff members! It was an incredible and overwhelming feeling, it was a feeling of celebration! After a few words from the YWAM maui base leader, the SBFM leader [my cousin Trevor Hilman] and a word from Ben, the Fall 09 DTS leader, we were all introduced and brought to the front to recieve a beautiful le'i of yellow flowers.
After the introductions there was an announcment for the SBFM people about what they would be doing tomorrow. Then came the announcment for us DTSers! We were told that we would be doing what is called an "Exodus". We were each given a very short list of items which we had to pack. They included the following: 3 pairs of underwear, 1 pair of socks, one shirt, one pair of shorts, one pair of pants, a pair of tennis shoes, a pair of sandals and a sweatshirt. A camera, a hat, contacts and eyeglasses, a sleeping bag, a bible, a notebook, and a pen. No toothbrush, no shampoo, no phones, or ipods, or makeup. Now we're all wondering what exodus includes, and well, thats just it. WE HAVE NO IDEA! All we know is that we will be in the woods without showers, toilets, or electricity and we'll be there for... who knows how long? It will be at least three days, most likely more. So, we're heading out tomorrow morning into the great unknown that is Exodus.
I'll give an update when we return [whenever that is] and fill you in on what I've been up to, but as for now I just don't know! I can't wait! It sounds absolutely amazing and I know by the end we'll all be smellier, dirtier, and grungier than we've ever been. But I also know that this is going to be an amazing time of growth and change for everyone! So, here I go... more later!!
I opened up my bible and began to read from verse 13 to the end of the chapter and I couldn't believe how perfectly it fit the starting of a DTS. It says the following
Ephesians 5:13-21
But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is the light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said, "Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." Be very careful, then, how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every oppertunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
I feel like the Lord really wants me to understand, that to truely walk in the Light of Christ and therefore to shine for Him, I have to wake up out of any spiritual ruts I've let myself fall into. He wants me to consider all my words and actions and make the most of every oppertunity to share the gospel with others, He wants me to seek His will in all things, He wants me to pursue Him that I might be filled with His holy presence. He wants me to use my gift of music, and to do it always for His honor and glory, and He wants me to submit myself to the service of others, becuase that is what Christ himself did.
I finished reading and just sat for a while taking it all in. I know God is going to do some amazing things and He's going to test me and stretch me in ways that will sometimes be painful and difficult, but they will bring me closer to being the person He wants me to be. A person more like Christ. That is the prayer of my heart and I can't wait to see Him move.
And so, that journey begins at 6 am tomorrow morning...
Tonight was the opening ceremony for the Fall 09 DTS. Everyone dressed up nice and was brought to a church in Paia. We walked in the doors and were waiting outside of a second set of doors that led to a fellowship area. Suddenly those doors were opened and all of the students were welcomed in by cheers and applause from all of the YWAM maui staff members! It was an incredible and overwhelming feeling, it was a feeling of celebration! After a few words from the YWAM maui base leader, the SBFM leader [my cousin Trevor Hilman] and a word from Ben, the Fall 09 DTS leader, we were all introduced and brought to the front to recieve a beautiful le'i of yellow flowers.
After the introductions there was an announcment for the SBFM people about what they would be doing tomorrow. Then came the announcment for us DTSers! We were told that we would be doing what is called an "Exodus". We were each given a very short list of items which we had to pack. They included the following: 3 pairs of underwear, 1 pair of socks, one shirt, one pair of shorts, one pair of pants, a pair of tennis shoes, a pair of sandals and a sweatshirt. A camera, a hat, contacts and eyeglasses, a sleeping bag, a bible, a notebook, and a pen. No toothbrush, no shampoo, no phones, or ipods, or makeup. Now we're all wondering what exodus includes, and well, thats just it. WE HAVE NO IDEA! All we know is that we will be in the woods without showers, toilets, or electricity and we'll be there for... who knows how long? It will be at least three days, most likely more. So, we're heading out tomorrow morning into the great unknown that is Exodus.
I'll give an update when we return [whenever that is] and fill you in on what I've been up to, but as for now I just don't know! I can't wait! It sounds absolutely amazing and I know by the end we'll all be smellier, dirtier, and grungier than we've ever been. But I also know that this is going to be an amazing time of growth and change for everyone! So, here I go... more later!!
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Aloha from Maui!
Wow! It's been a crazy few days! I'm finally here after quite a bit of scheduling troubles with flights and so forth but God is faithful and worked everything out! When I thought I wouldn't have to flight at all from Greenville, God provided one! When I thought I would have to spend a night in the Honolulu airport God worked it out so that I could stay at the YWAM Honolulu base with a hot shower and a warm bed! He is so awesome!
And now I've finally arrived.
The natural beauty of Maui is breathtaking... I actually teared up when we rounded a bend on the way to the Maui base and I saw the ocean for the first time! Unbelievable. It's such an awesome example of the imagination of our creator. The teal blue of the water, the green of the mountains, the details of the flowers, the innumerable kinds of trees and plants; there is no end to the variety of it all, and I get to LIVE here! Also unbelievable.
Beyond the beauty of the landscape is the beauty of the people I have met here. Within hours I was laughing with other students like we'd known eachother forever. One girl actually told me she couldn't believe I'd only arrived today because it felt like I had been there all along. Everyone is so friendly and the staff are all incredibly helpful and inviting. I know we are going to become our own little family in no time at all. We spent the later part of today just hanging out in the house and getting to know eachother better [I had several compliments on my Star Wars t-shirt] and I've found a few kindred spirits already!
Tomorrow begins the official first day of our DTS with a welcoming ceremony in the evening; I'm sure its going to be an awesome time! I can't wait to start classes and really delve into what God is going to do during these next six months! But as for now it's late and my body is telling me to go to sleep, so I'm going to listen!
GOODNIGHT AND GOD BLESS!
And now I've finally arrived.
The natural beauty of Maui is breathtaking... I actually teared up when we rounded a bend on the way to the Maui base and I saw the ocean for the first time! Unbelievable. It's such an awesome example of the imagination of our creator. The teal blue of the water, the green of the mountains, the details of the flowers, the innumerable kinds of trees and plants; there is no end to the variety of it all, and I get to LIVE here! Also unbelievable.
Beyond the beauty of the landscape is the beauty of the people I have met here. Within hours I was laughing with other students like we'd known eachother forever. One girl actually told me she couldn't believe I'd only arrived today because it felt like I had been there all along. Everyone is so friendly and the staff are all incredibly helpful and inviting. I know we are going to become our own little family in no time at all. We spent the later part of today just hanging out in the house and getting to know eachother better [I had several compliments on my Star Wars t-shirt] and I've found a few kindred spirits already!
Tomorrow begins the official first day of our DTS with a welcoming ceremony in the evening; I'm sure its going to be an awesome time! I can't wait to start classes and really delve into what God is going to do during these next six months! But as for now it's late and my body is telling me to go to sleep, so I'm going to listen!
GOODNIGHT AND GOD BLESS!
Thursday, September 3, 2009
We serve a BIG BIG God!
I had one of the most incredibley supernatural and amazing experiences of my life last night. I actually bawled this morning thinking back on how completely orchestrated by God it was!
Let me start at the beginning. As most of you know, I will be leaving to YWAM a week from today. This next week is not going to be easy as I leave all of my family and friends behind for the next six months. I've already had some really emotional moments just thinking about the reality of being away from home and the people I care about for so long and in those moments I have found myself asking God if I'm doing the right thing and if I'm going to be able to handle that seperation.
Last night I got His answer as clearly as it could ever be given.
I was in downtown Greenville with a good friend of mine and we ended up getting into a really indepth discussion about God and our faith while sitting in his car. It lasted quite a while and when it came time to leave we realized [to our dismay] that we'd forgotten the radio on the entire time and his battery was dead. Not a big deal unless neither you have jumper cables.
At this point its somewhere around two in the morning and there isn't a soul in sight so we decided our best bet was to walk up to the main road in downtown and see if there was a police officer around who could help us out. After walking a pretty good distance and seeing no one I was beginning to doubt we were going to find help unless we called someone, but moments later we saw one lone car parked on the side of the road with three people standing beside it [a guy and two girls], talking
Seeing as it was two in the morning on a Wednesday I didn't really know what kind of people we were encountering. Honestly my first thought was that they had probably been at a bar and were just now heading home.
[This was a lesson on 'snap judgements' for me as well.]
We walk up and say hi, explaining our dilemma, and ask if they happened to have a set of jumper cables. They said yes, and immediatly all three of them agreed to help and even offered to drive us back to his car in theirs. I was blown away by how friendly they were to us, complete strangers. As I got into the car, I happened to notice a sticker on the back window that said "I left my heart in Uganda". I thought that was cool, since I had been in Africa a year and a half ago, and said to the driver, a girl about 22 or 23, "You left your heart in Uganda, I left mine in Kenya."
Immediately her mouth dropped open and she said "You've been to Kenya?"
"Yes" I said, "I went there to do some mission work." Now all three of them are looking at me wide eyed as they tell me that they had just gotten back from Kenya two days before!
I start flipping out about how cool that is and the guy, probably about 25, asks me what I did there. I told him I had been working with the Masai tribe. Yet again all three mouths drop as they explain that that had been exactly what they were doing as well! Now all of us are laughing at how incredible it is that we happened to meet in downtown Greenville at two something in the morning and we've all done the exact same thing! I then went on to tell them about how I'll be leaving for my dts soon and explained about what it was. They all said they thought that was really great and then the girl driving asks me, with a curious expression, what day I'm leaving for my trip.
September tenth I say. Once again there is an outburst of laughter and disbelief. I'm confused and then the guy and one of the girls tells me that both she and he are leaving for sepperate mission trips on that EXACT same day! Now I'm flipping out because I realize what this is. It's not coincidence, or chance, or accident. It's a divine appointment set up by God!
Can we look at this again. Just as I'm in the midst of wondering if my direction is where God wants me to be, I run into three people who've done the mission trip I've already done and are leaving to do more mission work on the day that I am leaving! That's what you call confirmation.
I am now more certain than ever in my life that I am following God's plan for my life and it feels AMAZING! This is where I'm supposed to be. He will carry me when days get hard, because He has called me to this purpose! Praise the Lord for His awesome ways and that He is a BIG BIG God!!
Let me start at the beginning. As most of you know, I will be leaving to YWAM a week from today. This next week is not going to be easy as I leave all of my family and friends behind for the next six months. I've already had some really emotional moments just thinking about the reality of being away from home and the people I care about for so long and in those moments I have found myself asking God if I'm doing the right thing and if I'm going to be able to handle that seperation.
Last night I got His answer as clearly as it could ever be given.
I was in downtown Greenville with a good friend of mine and we ended up getting into a really indepth discussion about God and our faith while sitting in his car. It lasted quite a while and when it came time to leave we realized [to our dismay] that we'd forgotten the radio on the entire time and his battery was dead. Not a big deal unless neither you have jumper cables.
At this point its somewhere around two in the morning and there isn't a soul in sight so we decided our best bet was to walk up to the main road in downtown and see if there was a police officer around who could help us out. After walking a pretty good distance and seeing no one I was beginning to doubt we were going to find help unless we called someone, but moments later we saw one lone car parked on the side of the road with three people standing beside it [a guy and two girls], talking
Seeing as it was two in the morning on a Wednesday I didn't really know what kind of people we were encountering. Honestly my first thought was that they had probably been at a bar and were just now heading home.
[This was a lesson on 'snap judgements' for me as well.]
We walk up and say hi, explaining our dilemma, and ask if they happened to have a set of jumper cables. They said yes, and immediatly all three of them agreed to help and even offered to drive us back to his car in theirs. I was blown away by how friendly they were to us, complete strangers. As I got into the car, I happened to notice a sticker on the back window that said "I left my heart in Uganda". I thought that was cool, since I had been in Africa a year and a half ago, and said to the driver, a girl about 22 or 23, "You left your heart in Uganda, I left mine in Kenya."
Immediately her mouth dropped open and she said "You've been to Kenya?"
"Yes" I said, "I went there to do some mission work." Now all three of them are looking at me wide eyed as they tell me that they had just gotten back from Kenya two days before!
I start flipping out about how cool that is and the guy, probably about 25, asks me what I did there. I told him I had been working with the Masai tribe. Yet again all three mouths drop as they explain that that had been exactly what they were doing as well! Now all of us are laughing at how incredible it is that we happened to meet in downtown Greenville at two something in the morning and we've all done the exact same thing! I then went on to tell them about how I'll be leaving for my dts soon and explained about what it was. They all said they thought that was really great and then the girl driving asks me, with a curious expression, what day I'm leaving for my trip.
September tenth I say. Once again there is an outburst of laughter and disbelief. I'm confused and then the guy and one of the girls tells me that both she and he are leaving for sepperate mission trips on that EXACT same day! Now I'm flipping out because I realize what this is. It's not coincidence, or chance, or accident. It's a divine appointment set up by God!
Can we look at this again. Just as I'm in the midst of wondering if my direction is where God wants me to be, I run into three people who've done the mission trip I've already done and are leaving to do more mission work on the day that I am leaving! That's what you call confirmation.
I am now more certain than ever in my life that I am following God's plan for my life and it feels AMAZING! This is where I'm supposed to be. He will carry me when days get hard, because He has called me to this purpose! Praise the Lord for His awesome ways and that He is a BIG BIG God!!
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